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Monday, June 29, 2009

The second week...

Venus & Serena are looking good, watched a little of their double match - that's just scary.
ARod said he likes twitter 'cause he can follow the Huskers...I know that will make you all vry happy. ESPN had an article that said part of the reason he's doing so well this year, besides the fitness level, is the stability in his personal life. What do you know, man marries 21 year old SI swimsuit model and his life gets better. Amazing, what are the odds*
Don't worry ladies, NBC did mention that Andy banned her music for the fortnight because she likes cheesy pop crap. Ha! what a loser**
*sarcasm, obviously
**seriously, what is she 12? ...what me bitter? no, not bitter, happily married, you must be bitter and interpret my comments as such.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Tour de France Preview (Garmin-Slipsteam)

Team Garmin-Slipstream is based out of Boulder, CO, and are the only Pro Team that origin is American. They are also sponsored by Chipotle, how awesome is that. And their team president is Jonathan Vaughters, he's got some nice sideburns, but does not get along with bees.
-It will be curious to see how Christian Vande Velde races after breaking 4 vertebrae in the Giro d'Italia? I hope he comes back with super powers! Like riding a bike really fast!
-David Millar and Bradley Wiggins are rumored that they will be starting up British team, Team Sky, at the end of the year. Wiggo is in the middle of a 2 year contract, so he's not going anywhere. Who knows what David's going to do.
-Danny Pate, the pride and joy of Colorado Springs, is back on the team. Come on, Danny, you can win a stage this year!!
-Dave Zabriskie, a whole blog could be devoted to this guy. But to describe him could be summed up in one word: crazy. I really, really, really hope he does well and finishes the race, he is so quotable, if you can figure out what his talking about.

( I would publicly like to apologize to Star for posting her uncompleted post. Sadly, I didn't realize it wasn't unfinished. I just thought that she didn't have much to say about certain G-S riders... - boo)

Tour de France Preview (Astana)

First a little background: Team Astana is mainly sponsored by the government of Kazakhstan. Many of the main players (team director, riders, etc) from Team Discovery (US Postal before that(the team that won 7 Tours de France with Lance Armstrong)) came to Astana after it was rocked by the a doping scandal during the 2006 Tour de France. Confused? Welcome to the world of cycling.

-Alberto Contador almost started le Tour dressed in Argyle. How crazy would that have been!

-the Fat Cyclist, once again, has great advice for Johan 'the ass' Bruyneel on how to deal with 4 potential TdF winners, on the same team, in the same race. Although if my memory serves me right, Johan tried racing with multiple leaders before. The first TdF post-Lance was quite a disaster.

-Chis Horner did not make the team, which makes me sad since he's a fellow lover of In-N-Out Burger. Which reminds me, did you know Landon Donovan had In-N-Out Burger cater at his wedding? Brilliant!


Napoleon v. Napoleon

It was like Napoleon Dynamite playing a younger Napoleon Dynamite, but more unattractive. Was just waiting for a liger drawing contest to break out.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

He he he....

Not that I am happy to see a team lose, but I'm pretty sure it couldn't have happened to a better group. By the way, in case you haven't picked up on it, Texas (perhaps my most disliked team, ever) just got smoked by LSU in the CWS final series. Again, I repeat myself, he he he.


U.S. has a Men's Soccer team...

For real. I haven't watched the game yet, but dvr'd it for tonight (lucky Yen!!!) But I did see that the captain, Carlos Bocanegra was back - having been out with a bad hammy, happy eyes!
Also - I hope I get Star's name for Christmas, 'cause I know what to make her.
Okay - watched the game, the U.S. defended like crazy & our goal keeper was awesome. I think Jozy Altidore's shoulders are related to Dwight Howard and tiny Landon Donovan was super fast. All around amazing win.
Spain...that reminds me of when Boo was down visiting, and Mom & Dad were here with Mike & Hettie. Mike told us to pick a place to eat, so we decided to try a tapas bar. When Mike heard that he told Dad that he liked hanging out with those girls, 'cause they wanted to go to a topless bar for supper. Oh Mike, only you could make Mom laugh at that.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Day 2 in Londontown

Andy advanced today, so did Andy and Venus too.
Lleyton won too, and proved once again he should not share his opinions with the world because he reveals what a total asshat his is.
Sadly Boo, Safin tried kinda hard, okay not at all and lost to a very small American qualifier.
Most importantly, Steve Nash is wandering the streets of Brooklyn dressed as a hipster. If I was there I'd set a hipster trap for him with a discussion about the quality of light in polaroids, a MGMT album and a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon for bait. We don't really have hipsters wandering here in phoenix (1. too hot for skinny black jeans and scarves 2. I live in the suburbs, so they might be here but the Nascar banners hung in the garages scare them away-they like their blue collar from a distance)

Monday, June 22, 2009

Who?? Lucas Glover?? Huh???

Help me out, Jock. Who is this cat? And seriously, does Rory McIlroy even shave yet?

Dirtman is sitting out in the 107 degree heat (index) watching the evil empire (Texas) battle the party school (LSU) in the finals of the College World Series. 1-0 Tigers in the bottom of the 2nd. I'm not a huge LSU fan since they kind of take over, and a lot of locals like them, but there is no way I can even cheer a little bit for the 'Horns. I know I SHOULD cheer for the Big XII team, but no. Can't do it. Never have. Never will. And you can't make me.


Are you ready for some futbol?

Watched the U.S. v Egypt match yesterday. Somehow, amazingly the U.S. managed to win 3-0 and combine that with Brazil's 3-0 smack down of reigning world cup champions Italy, the U.S. moves out of pool play and on the semifinals of the Confederations Cup. The U.S. finished 1-2 in pool play, tied Italy in goal differential (-2) but advanced because of # of goals scored. Lucky Yanks now have to face world #1 Spain on Wednesday. dang.
Unrelated tennis analysis - Brad Gilbert is a tool.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

The Quiet Time....

Before Star goes all TdF on us and the fortnight really gets interesting, here's a piece tying the cycling TTT & the NBA - the writer is a nba guy, so he knows about 1/8 as much as Star does about cycling, but still interesting.
Yes, I know I have a nba problem.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Royals v. Snakes - from the Blue side

Ok, so Greinke is human. I was afraid of that, but still reality sucks. I think the KC hitters were spooked by the two different colored eyes, they really freaked me out.
Tonight we have Luke "taxicab with doors open" Hochevar starting on the mound. He's been doing alright, but his claim to fame is that his sister is a beach volleyball player. But her ears are very close to her head. Oh yeah and in his last start he threw 85 pitches in a comlete game win. Not bad.
On a side note the North Carolina baseball team has the same goofyass "spaceball" helmet as Texas. Who's going to tell them the look like idiots? Oh wait they just across town, I'll be right back.....


Sedona Red at Baby Blue...from the snake side

Don't worry KC fan(s) the Dbacks have a very hard time playing well for two games in a row. And Dan Haren is pitching (he's the AZ version of Greinke, but without the anxieties), which means he will receive absolutely no run support - 'cause they like to test him, and because his teammates are worthless.
No need to be frightened tonight Star, Mom would say "he has pretty eyes"  and she would be right. He does, however, have funny pitching mechanics - a "stop at the top" -a long pause with one foot suspended above the ground and then throws the ball. Should be a good game...just kidding.
Tonight Murphy tries to keep the devils alive- is Dirtman going?

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Golf, New York Style.

Ok, I'm supposed to be paying bills, so I thought I'd do a post instead. U.S. Open (the non-tennis one) starts tomorrow, so our TV now receives nothing except the Golf Channel.
Anyway, Bethpage Black up in New York is ridiculously difficult. Last time they played up there, Tiger was the only guy under par, and he sold his left knee for that (they collected last year). So they added 200 yards to the course and the crying has already started.
Expect a lot of the tears from Sergio, who has endeared himself to the obnoxious NY fans the way a bleeding seal wins over great white sharks.
BTW, John Daly is wearing those pants because they pay him to do so. That's about the only place he can draw a paycheck, and I believe his shame level is pretty low.
Personal favorite - Boo Weekley. The only PGA member that has admitted to boxing an orangutan. (he lost, apparently orangutans are pretty quick, and have good reach)


Greinke vs Snakes (Game 2)

Don't assume the two colored-eyed guy can't beat the Royals. He seems pretty distracting.

But the "Second Coming", as Lilly calls Zack, had two bad outings, and his ERA ballooned up to an obscene 1.72. That's alot of money for a beer! At one point, a bar was pricing a beer at Greinke's ERA on the nights he was starting.

Star would like to order up 3 more errors by the DBacks, that always helps.

Also, we would like to give some props to journeyman Willie Bloomquist, deceptively fast for a guy that looks like the hurt catcher John Buck. Not that it matters.

And let's hope that CWS game takes less than 4 hours tonight. Those games are ridiculous.

Snakes at the Greinke's - gm 2

The Dbacks lived up to form last night *slow clap* brilliant, way to be consistent boys.
Tonight they face the Second Coming, so they should probably save up their energy and give Danny some run support on Thursday. 
Missouri native Max Scherzer pitches tonight for AZ. He's young & fairly unpredictable...but had a good game going 7 innings in his most recent outing. But mostly he's known for having two different colored eyes...confusing and slightly scary.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Royal vs DBacks - game 1 (the blue side)

There are a handful of people who care about this game, I'm just not sure who they are. KC is showing the same stuff as they did last year when they would go on tremendously atrocious streaks. Lose like 8 in a row, win 1, then lose another 6 or so. Yikes. Can't hit, can't pitch, can't field. Thought I was watching the Huskers. By the way, that is not a compliment.

Tonight, Star's not-so-secret crush, Gil Meche will start. (Don't tell her other MLB bf.)He is coming off his best start of the year, a 9-0, 11K, 8 inning outing against somebody. (Can't remember. It's been 6 days.) And the team is coming off the first 3 game sweep of the year. Granted, it was against the hapless Reds. But we will take it.

My MLB bf who looks ALOT like Howdy Doody, will put his seven game hitting streak on the line tonight. Don't laugh, we take 'em where we can get 'em!

Ready for first pitch. Let's go Blue....

Dbacks at Royals - game 1 (from the snake side)

Dbacks continue interleague play tonight at Kansas City-who cares? Well, nobody really. 
On that's the dback's half-glass...
Doug Davis gets the start tonight, he had been doing well but had a terrible outing in his last game. DD is not gonna blow any pitches past you but he will wear you out. Plus he gets extra inspirational points after he was diagnosed with thyroid cancer last spring, had surgery and came back to pitch by midseason. 
The Dbacks are young and often make really stupid mistakes, like forgetting they need to score runs to win the game or that the game is 9 innings instead of 7. But depending on the lineup they may make your eyes be the judge.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Next year, please

Only 4 months till the NBA preseason starts, hooray! Then Dwight will be back and hopefully Shaqtus will be in Cleveland (or Chicago or Orlando, or anywhere but Phoenix). Stay classy LA.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Those are some pants...

Was watching a little bit of the PGA event today with V and Spud. At first, Brian Gay caught my attention with his very European-looking bright red pants with white belt. I know that I'm not up on golf fashion. (That would be Flex's wheelhouse.)
However, John Daly blew those away with his ridiculous checkered pants. Little did I know that it was a trend that has been going on for some time. Really should have been warned about that!

Friday, June 12, 2009

Will vs. Wild

Okay, this isn't sports related & also not timely-but if you have a chance to catch Man vs. Wild with Bear Grylls & Will Ferrell on the Discovery Channel it's worth it. It ran on the 2nd but they're showing reruns. Normally I only watch Bear when he's in warm weather locations for obvious reasons, but Will's pretty funny.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Last chance for Dwight?

Since this could potentially be my last NBA post of the year (if Team Kobe wins tonight -its over and the NBA will be dead to me till next season) So, Dwight needs to bring it and Team Kobe needs to stand around and watch Kobe try to do everything, then it might turn out okay. Did I mention Dwight needs to play well? Yes, he does, he being Dwight.
Can-Jeez was on David Letterman last night - presenting his report from the NBA finals. He was funny (of course), with questionable hair (of course). Then at the end Dave asked and Steve said he'd love to play for the knicks and I threw my cereal bowl at the tv. DO NOT TOY WITH ME STEVE!!!

Fast Frankie

Well, fast for us. This weekend our baby sister Frank set the female family PR for the half at 1:50:39. Since this was her 9th half marathon she's not exactly a newbie and surprisingly she actually trained for it instead of just showing up. Like a good sport she answered a couple questions and gave us some advice. 
Why did you decide to do it? Because I trained for the lincoln, got sick and wanted to mark one up in 2009
What was the hardest part of training? (or should I ask - did you train?) Finding time
If you were going to start your training again what, if anything, would you do differently?  Maybe do more outside….hills
What was your average mileage per week? Longest run? Avg 15…..longest was 18 miles
What would have been the absolute worst thing to eat right before the race?  A whole package of Star crunches
If you could have had one person run beside you to talk to, who would it have been?  Dad
In the race what was your easiest mile/section? From mile 2-5 it was pouring down rain - so I couldn’t think about it Hardest mile/section? Last 1.1 miles
At the hardest part of the race, what did you do to ignore the pain &finish?  Turn up the i-pod
When it feels like your legs are whipped cream and all you hear is the voice in your head telling you to walk - what do you do/think of to ignore it?  Think I need to pass the girl in the pink
Did any of the course, spectators or other runners stand out to you?  The trailer park was a treat
What body part hurt the most right after the race?  The next day? After the race was bottom of my feet, next three days my legs -all of my legs
What percent of the whole thing is mental? 99.9%  I’m really not a runner, I have a belly and I like to eat crap and I can run 8:23 splits…..really mental.
PS. Don’t eat 2 ½  arbys roast beef sandwiches right after the race….they went right through me literally.
Congrats Frankie!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Dogpiles by star

After basking in my winningness for the last few days I'm back.
I was going to blog on all the dogpiles of the CWS qualifying teams, but couldn't find all the pictures. So instead I'm going to blog about the best dogpile I've ever seen.
This is when the Huskers made it to the CWS in 2005. And the stripy socks were all the rage. Looking back, there are 4 major leaguers on that team.
The guy running to the pile out of uniform is the great Alex Gordon. 'Why is he out of uniform' you ask, 'he was thrown out of the game for back talking to an ump' I answer.
The big guy leaning on the pile on the right side the Joba 'F***ing Bugs' Chamberlain. Note: he can't get off the ground.
The second fellow from the left is Zach Kroenke. He is almost up to the Yankees bullpen. If he's not yet, he will be by the end of the year.
Right under him (all you see is the head) is Brian Duensing, he was in the Twins bullpen earlier this year.
It was a blast! Sweeping Miami in 2 games! Ahhh, those were the days!

Road to Omaha... by boo

We are ready here in Omaha to welcome the 8 teams that will be playing for the NCAA National Championship next week. (read… drinking, puking and public urination along 13th Street and at Pauli’s… not me, the college kids…) There are two new teams to the group, along with some traditional favorites.

Here is a brief preview of each of the teams.

Arkansas – One of the two teams that will probably be “fan-favorites”, the Hogs have been up a few times recently. Their head coach, Dave Van Horn, revived the Husker baseball program back in the late 90’s and he will be getting a lot of the love from the locals. However, DVH has brought 3 teams to the CWS and is 0-fer the tourney. I don’t look for much from them this year, since they are the only team in the field that NU has a win over. However, their 2B has the best name in the tourney, Ben Tschepikow. Keep an eye on him...

Cal State Fullerton – My favorite to win this side of the bracket, the Titans (oddly, their mascot is an elephant) always bring a lot of fans up to Omaha, most famously, Kevin Costner. So I always hope they go far. Mostly, because they spend their money here, and, if they are around for the Championship series, Costner shows up!

LSU – A traditional power, the Tiger fans always show up in droves and paint the town purple and yellow. You can wander the parking lot and they will invite you to random tailgates. And those folks can cook. Their team is ok, too. Geaux Tigers!

Virginia – One of those first time teams, they will get a lot of local attention since their head coach is a local boy who played on Creighton’s 1991 CWS team. Don’t know much about them, but would expect a quick exit. Don’t have a reason, since a lot of first time teams have done well in the past couple years. But they are the Cavaliers. Don't know if that is good or bad, just ask LeBron.

North Carolina – Remarkably, this team is making its 4th trip in 4 years to Omaha. I hope they get kicked out early since they have basketball, they don’t need baseball, too. Sour grapes, perhaps. But that’s all I’ve got on the Tar Heels.

Southern Mississippi – The other new team to the field, I don’t know much about them except that they kept Florida from making it. Yea. No Florida, FSU or Miami this year. And only one from CA. Loaded up on the Deep South, however. Might be a scary crowd.

Arizona State – Another perennial visitor to the CWS. Funny coach. Really like Pat Murphy, and Dirtman has chosen them as his “adopted” college team. That is a concept I do not buy into. I cheer for only one team… forget about the rest…

Texas – Saved the worst for last. Really struggled to cheer for the hated Longhorns, but needed at least one Big XII team to make it. Can’t stand the team, the school, the coach or the nasty big white Spaceballs batting helmets. But that is neither here nor there. They came into the tourney as the #1 overall seed, but struggled throughout. So that means they will probably do well here in Omaha. Blech, burnt orange.

Dirtman will probably try to make it to all the games, so I’m sure I will get some brilliant insights from him. Not. He will watch the games, but will be unwilling to make any observations about physical characteristics of the players. What fun is that….

Some offseason Nash

So be sure to catch Steve Nash reporting for David Letterman from the NBA finals- he'll be on the show wednesday night. One can only hope it's as good as his vitamin water commercials. Don't know if he'll take his shirt off, so here's a pic to tide you over. I know, surprisingly hairy for a canadian.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Dinara ****cough, cough, choke*** Safina

Dinara Safina, #1 in the world, looking for her first Grand Slam title, looked a little hapless against her Russian counterpart Kuznetsova. I was only able to watch the first couple games before Dirtman and I went out for a run and Farmer's Market. She looked a little hesitant early, but thought that she would make it a match. Not so much.

She is less a grunter than a moaner. You can still hear her groan as the ball is landing on the other side of the net. ANNOYING. And not that I am all about the looks, but... it appears her brother got all of them in the family. Yummy. Love that big sexy Russian. (Gave you some bonus Tommy Haas coverage in there!)

Can Calvin Borel get his personal Triple Crown today? There are some saying that Mine That Bird has the stamina for the longer Belmont, but Borel's inexperience at the track might be a problem in timing his move.

Happy Birthday, Lilly!!! I'll drink a couple for you with Frankie tonight. She'll be in for the CB Half tomorrow am. Hope I can keep up with Mr. T in the 1 mile. He's pretty fast for a 4 year old.

Friday, June 5, 2009

NBA finals, so sad

I can't even comment on the finals thus far, ugh. seriously? Luke Walton? getting productive minutes? and Team Kobe still winning? by 25? double ugh. *head to desk, reach for drink*
Star asked me today if the Magic can come back, I don't know but in my dream scenario Team Kobe goes up 3-1 and then suffer an epic collapse which ends with Kobe dropping from Staples Center ceiling dressed in all black to take revenge on his pathetic teammates.
BFA use #2 - Okay - Stan van Gundy is almost to easy, really you all could have guessed this one, the master of panic is..."The Scream" by Edward Munch. I know, I wanted something less obvious, but its too perfect. Only thing wrong is the guy in the painting isn't dressed poorly enough.
I thought "The Elephants" by Salvador Dalî was a nice fit for Coach Zenmaster. Do you understand it? I don't, that's why its perfect. And as Hubby pointed out - the elephants are tall like him. Brilliant, he should get an honorary degree in art history for that.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Trés Bon Rogerer, Au Revoir Serena

Yips Shankova managed to not mentally break down and beat Serena in three sets today. On the women's side there are two Russians, an Australian and a Slovak left in the draw...I'm pretty sure there's a joke in there.
Rogerer beat Gael Monfils (best name on the tour) in three sets, Rogerer woke up during the first set tiebreak and realized he's Rogerer Federer and put the smack down on the young frenchman.
And the Bryan Bros are still alive in doubles...

NBA finals meets BFA

Finally, I can use my degree. Okay, lets say you have to describe Dwight Howard & Kobe Bryant using one piece of art.

Dwight first, 'cause he's super easy. Jeff Koons' Balloon Dog.(shown in yellow, put imagine it in blue) Happy, light, fun, larger than life, easy on the eyes, self aware enough to realize the joke-but completely okay with it. 
Kobe was choice was Leonardo Da Vinci's Vetruvian Man. Perfection, rigid adherence to form, beauty with joylessness.
Tomorrow....Stan Van Gundy & Zenmaster

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner

So today Boo, myself and a adopted sister whom shall remain nameless, since she doesn't have a nickname (you know her as the one who ran the San Fran & Seattle 1/2's with us) went to Football 101 with the Nebraska football coaches.
So after running some drills with the coaches and listen to Coach Bo, Carl and Watson there was a quiz by the guy in charge of the academics for the athletes at UNL. I got to answer the bonus question, which I got right, and won a chance to be a 'football recruit' for any game this year. This means I will be treated to lunch, meet the coaches (which I already did today), get to be on the field during warm ups and the tunnel walk.
I think I'm able to take someone with me, Boo's already called dibs. I'll see if I can get more.

'staches: tell me why again?

Dback's not-a-rookie reliever Clay Zavada has been getting alot of publicity lately for his mustache. It's very old school. He has a great life story (read this article from the NY Times). 
But in the best of obscure sporting mustache gallery there must be room for Dave Z. Lots of room. Also for his teammate Steve Cozza (thanks star)
Of course there is one cyclist that could totally pull it off.

creating the championship tennisbot

I was reading this article today which proposed that the U.S. needs more crazy tennis parents to push their children to become champions, since the U.S. tennis association is in a bit of a drought. Speaking of crazy tennis parents... Maria Sharapova's dad wasn't coaching enough or making enough crazy threats from the stands, or maybe Dominika Cibulkova is way to tough of a slovak to fall for that. She downed Maria 6-0, 6-2. Buh Bye Maria, can't say I'll miss your ridiculously deliberate serve preparation or your annoying noises. 
Congrats to Andy for doing so well - second week. well done. (fourth round, four pictures)